Last set of preview pics! I did all the makeup for them. :3 Also, I failed hard and didn't put a link up last time, but if you're interested in seeing me in Cats you can buy tickets here:

http://www.starstrucktheatre.org/

Comment or PM me if you've got plans to come up so we can discuss them/meeting times and all that good stuff.

Also, I got pulled over by a cop tonight for having my "license plate light out". Didn't get a ticket, but I didn't even know I HAD a light on my license plate LOL.

It's taken a few days for it to sink in with me. I think I was kind of resisting having any feelings about it because I had other things going on in my life that were already monopolizing my emotional facilities, but I finally let it sink in tonight that he's really gone. I just spend the last half hour watching some of his best videos and it's now just dawned on me what a loss the world has experienced with his passing.

Growing up, I was familiar with Thriller and Billy Jean, but those were not the songs that defined my youth. I was born in '85, several years after Thriller was released, and I started watching MTV when I was in 5th grade. My all-time favorite Michael Jackson video was Scream, which I think is such an underrated song. Scream was such a freaky video, and I was completely obsessed with it. People say they loved Michael Jackson when he was still black, but I LOVED Michael Jackson's white years. I loved his androgynous look in Scream and You Are Not Alone (Lisa Marie Presley LOL). And I just loved the interaction between he and Janet in Scream, although I think Michael had to hold back a little so that he didn't totally upstage Janet during their dance together.

Going back and watching some of his live performances gave me chills. The man is inhuman when he dances. He never takes a wrong step, and it the most fluid dancer I've ever seen. He's a fucking machine, literally. He does things live that are seemingly impossible. I know Justin Timberlake aspired to be the next King of Pop, but never in a million years could he even come close to the dance moves that Michael Jackson did. There's never been a dancer like Michael Jackson, and it'll be a long time before we see another one like him. Also, NO BETTER MOONWALK EXISTS. Watching him moonwalk is fucking HYPNOTIZING. It's unreal. I wish I could've seen him live.

Rest in peace, man.

Won't you come see me in Cats?









Pretty please??

EDIT: Tickets are selling rather quickly, so if you haven't gotten yours (for those who are going) it's best to get them sooner rather than later. :)

I feel like I need to get something off my chest, but I don't know what it is. So I guess I'll just write it out and maybe I'll feel better.

skratty007 spent like the entire weekend with me. (I love that boy.) I didn't realize how lonely I was with Yuriy being in Seattle this weekend until Benjy spent the whole weekend with me and then had to leave. It was like, the second I got home after taking him home there was this awful silence in the house that was totally deafening. And like, even when I call someone to chat up, I don't really have anything to say, so talking doesn't really help. It's like the only thing I'm able to do is just embrace the silence. It's amazing how quiet a place is when you don't have cable. It's like I have too much time to think now, and I just wish I could turn on the TV so my brain can switch off for a while.

I don't know what happened with my weight. I was doing so good, and my body was looking really satisfactory, and then I went out and ate a couple of nights in a row this last week and now I hate the way I look. I'm not sure why 3 hours of dance is not making any significant difference, but I've got like 4 weeks to Comic Con so I really hope something will change in the next couple of weeks.

My first day at the bank is tomorrow. I wonder if I could BART there. EDIT: Apparently I can! Should be interesting.

Since I kept referencing it on Twitter but I don't know when I'll finish it, here's a peek at the ASOIAF fanart I drew a couple of nights ago:



It's a small part of a much larger piece. Lots of background still left to color. It feels good to actually draw something relatively satisfying among the crap I've been drawing lately.

I feel so empty right now. Sorry for all the emo posts, it's kind of weird to describe. I'm not feeling down, just... empty. Cats is bringing a lot of fulfillment for me right now, but I'm only able to enjoy it while I'm there. For the other 21 hours of the day, there's just nothing. It feels nice when I'm with friends, but being with them reminds me of what I really want and am missing from my life.

Well, I don't think I felt a whole lot better after writing this. I'm not feeling bad, just kind of hollow. I'll probably lock this later, it feels a bit like a pointless post.

BOBBOBBOBBOBBOB HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

YOU TOO OSCAR!!!

Tuesday: rurouni_jedi gets a flat tire. maximumhuzzah was with her when it happened (and kept her company for the 2 hours that it took to get the car fixed).



Thursday: maximumhuzzah gets a flat tire. The universe has a sick sense of humor.

( Gee, I wonder... )

I did nothing today of value today. :\

I did, however, read Abyss spoilers (WTF PEOPLE WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THESE BOOKS 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE???). I must say, I am intrigued. Even if I do still hate Denning's guts for Invincible.

Thanks so much to everyone who commented in my last journal entry; I was kind of terrified that everyone was going to be like "What the fuck are you thinking Shea? Are you a goddamn idiot or something??" And then I was going to feel really bad for even toying with the idea in the first place.

The next day after I posted that entry, the airfare deal I found was gone, and today I spent almost exactly $400 getting my wheels replaced after getting a flat on my way to lunch with maximumhuzzah. SO. Obviously not going to New York in 5 days, but that doesn't mean I've given up the dream. Actually, the whole situation has given me more resolve.

As it turns out, it looks like they hold auditions about every 6 months, vs. once a year like I originally thought. Auditions in the summer are for new cast members, and auditions in the winter are for mid-season replacements. I wasn't so disillusioned to think that I'd really be able to compete against professional dancers, so I'm going to spend the time between now and the next auditions in the winter to take some lessons with a voice coach and find a dance studio to get better at dancing. And then I'm going to audition for Cats every chance I get. If I don't get it the first time out (which I probably won't), I'll go back the next time. And if I don't get in the next time, I'll audition the time after that, and so on and so forth until I either A) lose interest, or B) land a part.

I know this all seems out of left field, considering my desire to pursue a career in the art field, and I still would love to do that. But internally, this doesn't feel out of character for me at all. I've always had a love affair with Cats, it's something I thought about often and fondly, even in between years when I didn't see the show. It's simply not a show that I can get sick of. And what's more, how freaking fun would it be to tour the country? Sure, it'd be hella exhausting, and I wouldn't want to do it my whole life, but my twenties would be a perfect time to do something like that. I'm setting myself that goal before I'm out of my twenties for as long as I still dream about being in Cats.

And to make this cats-related post well-rounded, have some photos of an adorable cat: ( SAMWISE )

I need a cat-related icon.

I'm usually the first person to hold myself back from doing something because it's "too big of a dream" or "there's no chance it'll ever happen to me", but I found out that the National Tour of Cats: The Musical is holding auditions.

Next Monday.

In New York.

And I've actually found a semi-reasonable plane ticket.

Deep down, I'm sure it won't happen. I'd have to A) miss two days of rehearsals to go, B) miss my first day of training at the bank, and C) spend about $400 to basically go to an audition that I would never in a million years have a shot at getting a part in because I'm not in any way, shape or form a professional dancer. But I do have the love, and the heart, and part of me is telling myself that I'm only young once and to do stuff outrageous so I'll never regret not having given it a shot.

There's always next year, but who knows, maybe next year I'll be working a great job making a shitload of money, and it'll be inconceivable for me to attempt to try out. It's pretty inconceivable right now, but it's not 100% inconceivable. Maybe like 99%.

Good day today was good. Defninitely worth posting about!

( Putting this under a cut for photos )

I got my unitard painted today! I'm so stoked, I had no idea what it would end up looking like but I absolutely LOVE it!

( I'm a TABBY cat! )

AHHHHHHH OMGGGGG HYPERVENTILATING THEY SENT ME A PHOTO OF MY LIGHTSABERRRRRRRRRR



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH IM SO HAPPY WITH IT WORTH EVERY PENNY T________________________T

EDIT: And just to show you how happy I am with how it came out, here's the drawing/measurements I gave them to base it off of:

Okay, I don't care how retarded it makes me look, I TOTALLY fangirled like an idiot when I saw the New Moon trailer. I thought I was over my RPattz obsession, but CLEARLY I'm not. Yuriy is SOOOO in for it. :DDD

I need a Twilight icon. D:

( I've got ants in my pants )

In other news, I bought a point-and-shoot digital camera. It's the Panasonic Lumix DMC-FX500S; Yuriy spent several hours with me last night sorting through all the different digital cameras until we found this one that best fit my needs. I've wanted a little camera like this for so long, my old Powershot G5 was great but it was XBOXHUGE and it was impossible to carry around in a purse. So now I'll be able to take photos other than crappy phone pictures. You can bet I'm going to have a ton of rehearsal photos up when I get the camera!

This is the first of three posts I'll be making in the next couple of days. This post is basically going to be a photo dump of this weekend.

To briefly summarize my weekend, it was B&N + 24 Hour Fitness + Rehearsals + daenerys + Fanime. Yaya came to stay with me, which was SOOOO much fun but sadly I barely got to see her (or anyone else) with all the work and rehearsals I had over the weekend. At one point in the weekend, I had 4-hour rehearsals immediately followed by a 6-hour closing shift at B&N and got home around midnight, and then had to turn around and be at 24 Hour from 6am-10am, followed by a 10:30am-4pm shift at B&N. I was quite possibly the most tired I've been since that time I pulled three all-nighters in a row working on a project for school.

Aaaaaaanyway, the only time I attended Fanime for any measurable amount of time was on Friday. It was awesome to see people I hadn't seen in quite a while, but to be honest, conventions are almost meaningless without my usual peeps, who I sorely missed (although Yaya and Joey certainly made a valiant effort to keep my spirits up!). I only had my iPhone camera on me, so sorry for the low quality, but I managed to capture what I thought was a good visual representation of my weekend.

( Photos! )

So, my next couple of posts are going to be about SuperCon (I have a disc of photos but they're in my car) and the possibility of organizing anyone who wants to come up to see my play. *thumbs up*

Okay, I cried my eyes out for about 15 minutes and after reading the sweet comments you guys left in my last post, I'm feeling better now. Thank god for wonderful friends, you guys are awesome. (I went ahead and locked the comments on that one, since I'm feeling better.) I'm going to have as good a weekend as I can, daenerys is staying with me for 5 days!!! How can it not be good?? And I'm going to drop by Fanime as often as work and rehearsals will allow me, I probably won't wear anything but it'll be good to give hugs to friends I haven't seen in a long while (I'm looking at you slave_to_anime!).